sadistic majestic

Graceless. Trying to be tactful and failing. This all would have been much, much easier if it had been accomplished via Facebook chat. Or even Twitter, because sparing someone the public humiliation of being dumped via a public social network is just not her style. “Today is the day I’m dumping @****” as the tweet would have read. As she’s sitting here staring at him wondering how many favorites and retweets she would have gotten from that one, and whether or not it would have positively impacted her Klout score.

But no. Instead, here she is, struggling to remember what pithy excuses she had formulated in her head for not wanting to sleep with him. They all just sound ridiculous now, and she’s really regretting the decision to the “honorable” thing, rather than passive aggressively ignoring all his phone calls and text messages, and then, when, inevitably, he comes into her work to say hello, pasting a glazed over and vapid smile on her face. Which would be the best way of communicating her utter ennui with the whole situation. But no. 

She feels like an asshole, and that’s probably because she is one. Lackadaisically shrugging her shoulders while he asks her questions that she doesn’t really have the patience to answer. In all honesty, it was just an arbitrary snap judgment that she clung to in moments of weakness. In all honesty, her decision didn’t really make any sense, unless you look at it from the perspective of, “I just want to hurt another living creature.” Then it made sense. Maybe this is all just a manifestation of her own self destructive tendencies, and shame on him for thinking he could withstand the whirlwind of self inflicted pain and chaos. 

She likes to watch him squirm, so she says as little as she possibly can, just to make it look like she’s still engaged in the conversation. The only thing that’s keeping her going is anticipating the look of confusion and hurt that will mar his face for days to come. 

And when it’s done, just to make herself feel slightly better, she’ll bike on over to somebody else’s house, and start the same cycle over again.