I’m not sure what it is exactly, but in the past year or so I have seen a lot of friends either lose their lives or their minds. Is it cause were getting older? Is it because the pressure is getting too hard to bear? They say once you reach your thirties you feel this great relief, like some weight is immediately lifted off your shoulders. First of all, that has to be bullshit, but second of all, how do they ever expect us to get there if no one warned us about how soul crushing our late twenties would be? I feel like I can’t breathe when I think about my own little insignificant life, nevermind when I take a look outside my bubble of narcissism and see the world crumbling around me. What’s the point in staying clean, on the so-called “straight and narrow” (fuck, I hate that expression) when it isn’t making any difference? I feel suffocated and I know I’m not alone. I watch my friends struggle every single day. I read about people I don’t know cracking under the weight of injustices; fighting battles I’ll never be able to truly understand. And I look down at my bruised, scarred arms and legs and all I can think is “what’s the point?” I know my loved ones I’ve lost asked themselves the same question. Is there a key to finding the point? Cause I’m pretty sure that simply turning 30 in two years isn’t gunna solve things.
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